Hamburger Mary's

I hope you all know, that I love kitsch.

The atmosphere alone at Hamburger Mary's is enough for me to give them a passing grade. Most of their tables are themed (Betty Boop, Harley Davidson, Comic books, etc.) and there is American iconography and camp everywhere. They don't even need the drag queen mascot to be known as "that gay burger place".


On to the edibles:

I ordered the Breakfast Sandwich. It was, and I quote, "turkey sausage with scrambled egg and cheddar cheese on a brioche bun." It came with a choice of side: b'fast potatoes, grits, a short stack, or fresh fruit (you get this side selection with all of the brunch items). I went with the short stack because I am a fat kid who loves his carbs.

When my sammie came, the first thing I noticed was the lack of a brioche bun. It was toast. I'm not picky, so I scarfed that shiz.

It was okay--nothing amazing. This is probably because I ordered a pretty basic item. One thing I will say is that everyone at the table who ordered a dish with turkey sausage said that it tasted weird. I didn't mind the sausage so much, it was a little oddly sweet, but it really was the only thing that added any kind of "pop" to my sandwich. The pancakes were good (because it is rather difficult to screw up pancakes).

I had been to Hamburger Mary's once before and ordered the "Gouda Morning" Burger (Mary's half-pound natural Angus patty, topped with bacon, gouda cheese, and an over-medium egg with baby spinach, diced scallion, and honey mustard). I would highly recommend this dish if you attend a Hamburger Mary's Brunch. It is deliciously artery-clogging. One of my fellow Brunch-Clubbers ordered it with a side of tater tots, & I heard no complaints from him.

So to recap: I was underwhelmed with my food selection, but the ambience and $2 mimosas (I had 2!) sort of made up for my sucky decision making.

Final Grade: B+ (Because of the atmosphere, cheap mimosas, and flirty waiter)

Wicked Hop, Wicked Flat

I really love brunch. I try to eat it every Sunday. This blog will be exploring & reviewing different brunching establishments. I’m living in Milwaukee right now, so most of the content will be based on Milwaukee restaurants. Obviously if I encounter an out-of-town brunch house, I’ll review that. Got it? Good.

Today I ate at Wicked Hop. It was just okay.

I ordered a Bloody Mary after sipping my sister-in-law’s. I usually don’t like them, but I was in a certain mood, so I went for it.

De-licious!

It was spicy. It came with a veritable feast of goodies: a beef stick, a pickle, a mound of smoked cheese strings, a garlic-soaked mushroom, an effing SHRIMP, & a green olive.

If my only exposure to the Wicked Hop’s brunch was this Bloody Mary, I would have given the place a million stars & had my wedding ceremony & reception in it.

Unfortunately, I got food.

I ordered the Eggs Benedict with crab cakes. It came with a side of potatoes.

As a Brunch Lover, Eggs Benedict is sacred. I know it’s hard to poach an egg, but if you are a purveyor of brunchesque goods, you need to master the process.

My yolks were cooked solid!

Anyone who knows anything about Eggs Benedict knows that the poached egg should, by default, be runny, so that when you slice into your egg, the yolk runs out & soaks your English Muffin in scrumptious heaven.

These eggs were solid, tough, & rubbery all the way through. Nasty.

Now, my sister-in-law (Sara) likes her Eggs Benedict solid, which is fine, but that’s not the standard; Wicked Hop should only present solid poached eggs at the request of their patrons. 

The potatoes were pretty boringly standard. I bit into one & it had that earthy taste that can only be attributed to dirt. No rosemary. No garlic. Just salt.

Everyone else I was brunching with seemed as equally underwhelmed by their food.

I don’t think I’ll be making this place a regular on my brunching circuit (unless it’s to pre-game with a Bloody Mary)

Final Grade: C- (only because of the A+ company & Bloodies!)